Make your shoes


Dearest T-Noy,

They will tell you you have big shoes to fill. That your big sister did this and this and that and sometimes it will scare you and sometimes it will encourage you. I know because for a long time my life was about filling big shoes. I wanted to fill the big shoes of Calvin Nyakundi(KCPE hero) , the big shoes of the ideal big sister, the big shoes of my predecessors in almost each leadership position I took…This method was good, because it gave me something to measure myself against and I would be happy whenever I filled and over-filled some shoes. The praise that came afterward was always something that I looked forward to. However, the discontentment and even shame that came with falling  short of these standards was painful. Still, I thought the solution would be to work harder to fill in the big shoes until my aleph moment.

You see the thing with spending life filling someone else’s shoes is that it leaves you empty. It is a never-ending process of chasing after someone else’s dream, goals and aspiration and while this may make you joyful and add to your praises, it is simply  dishonest . I think we are here to have life and have it in full and not to slave away trying to meet other people’s expectations of who we need to be. While it looks like the harder way it really is the easier way out. I mean all you have to do is tick the boxes and voila the shoes are filled. In your case all you need to do is get good grades and get a good university where you will do a stable money-generating course so you can have enough to spare for charity and causes and then you are done but I dare you to create.

Here’s the creation challenge sweetheart. I want you to grab your chisel, leather, soles, cobbler’s glue and whatever else is used to make shoes and create your own pair. It doesn’t matter if the design is non-existent all that matters is that you are creating it. In fact, if the design is non-existent the better. Don’t worry if people may not “buy” or celebrate your shoe, the only loss worth avoiding here is that of your soul’s fulfillment.So even add a few accessories…make it glittery or dull or popping with colours or dazzling with African prints wharefa…. Make sure the shoes fit just right so that you can breathe your way through life. Have fun while creating the shoes and always always be ready to fail and whenever you fail, fail forward. That means, in case you realise you used to much leather on one shoe here’s your chance to discover what other material can make great shoes so you can try paper or teflon or whatever. Know that your own failures are better off than failures caused by other people’s decision.

Really all I am saying is that you need to live your own life because that is all that really matters. Filling shoes is good but you don’t want good, you want great, you want destiny, you want to make your mark, you want to live!

Love,

Chebet