A Great disapointment

The hardest part of growing up is finding that you find great solace in such lyrics as The Script’s  “Now it seems that every brand new generation have all been growing up with cracks in the foundation. They’re trying to fill the holes of a whole damn nation.That’s lost its trust,yeah (that’s lost its trust)We gotta change before the train leaves the station and realize that revolution ain’t a revelation it takes blood, sweat, tears and innovation
It starts with us (it starts with us)“. or Lennon’s ” They hurt you at home and they hit you at school, they hate you if you’re clever and they despise a fool.’Til you’re so fucking crazy you can’t follow their rules a working class hero is something to be. When they’ve tortured and scared you for 20 odd years then they expect you to pick a career. When you can’t really function, you’re so full of fear, a working class hero is something to be. Keep you doped with religion, and sex, and T.V. and you think you’re so clever and classless and free but you’re still fucking peasants as far as I can see. A working class hero is something to be. There’s room at the top they are telling you still but first you must learn how to smile as you kill. If you want to be like the folks on the hill.

The hardest part is realising that so many things were lies. Some systematic, some cultural and some temporary. Lies set in place to hold the status quo. Lies to make it all less painful.Lies to keep the system running. Here is the worst one, lies to protect you. To protect you from the big bad and good world that you will eventually have to face when destiny decides to take away the protection…No, no I think this is the worse one, realising that some of those lies you despise so are interwoven into your very own life that living may just mean excruciatingly pulling out the lies.

It is finding out that the only truths that you grew up was the warning John 15:18 that you simply do not belong to this world. I think the salt to the injury is that even if you do not belong you need to live here in the hope that all this too shall pass even when everything feels anything but temporary…

It is realising that this world through realistic lens is simply a great disappointment!

Now after the realisation, the reaction is your choice. I think am choosing to swim against the reality wave. To hope. To love. To have faith. To be one of the foolish naive ones. To carve out a place where I can temporarily belong. To carve out a place that makes it all just a little bit brighter, a little bit truer. I think that’s all that’s left…